To Argha....For the times I forgot to say.......

In the mad mad rush to live, to exist, we let go of our past, at least we try our level best to do so. It seems only fair to forget all that had happened, history being a tough subject to learn by heart, coz there are so many things to remember. It seems to be a tough ask to remember all those stupid things we did in the past, most of which realized were mistakes. For all those things that were right, there was nothing wrong about them, so why take the pain of remembering them. They were right, for God’s sake!!! And so we go on, right from getting up in the morning, to eating our first meal on time, trying to get our younger ones to eat their breakfast, packing healthy meals, fruits, organizing the house, reading the newspaper to remain updated, meetings,lectures, pp presentations, politics, fashion, future planning, finance, renewal of insurance, paying premiums, calling up people on their birthdays, buying gifts for our parents….Oops! In-laws too, and then its time to go to bed. Our hours, days, months rush by. Years go past us without realization. Suddenly you are thirty, and you have to decide which age- defying potion to buy, and not forget your calcium along with your partners vitamins.
One fine day, you realize you are old, and life has just gone by. You are all alone, by yourself, have all the time in the world, but nothing to do with it! There is no one to talk to, one to fight with, no one to blame, no one to laugh with, no one to cry with! Worse even, one fine day, your partner is taken away by a cruel joke of fate…. And you are left by yourself. Well, the logical solution would be to mourn the loss, and go on with your life because life as we know it waits for none. But then, would it be all the same? Would starting all over again be easy? Would the same struggle to live, the same need to look good, stay healthy, be successful start all over again? God! What have we become? I would really like to say, I have started getting freaked out after realizing how mechanical everything has become in my life!
What made me suddenly this wise? You guys can stop the guessing game now. It is my favourite mush movie that gave me this rude shock today. Sony pix was airing ‘PS: I love you’ since 2:35 this afternoon. It is one of my best seen romances till date. Suddenly while watching this movie I got the scare of my life. What if suddenly I didn’t have him by my side? What if I had to live in a house alone? What if all these mundane monotonous chores lose all their significance in a moment? We all forget to tell our partners we love them after a few years of being together. Actually after spending a long time together companionship becomes a habit, and after becoming a parent it often becomes very inconvenient to express your emotions. I mean it would seem very embarrassing to suddenly stop him while he is going to office after dropping the child to school and give him a passionate kiss. So a brief hug it is, and a quick cursory brushing of lips, and “have a nice day.” After a certain time we forget how wonderful it was to sit quietly holding hands, listening to a favourite song!

And to think of it, I had fallen so madly in love with this guy before I married him! Sounds familiar, right? Most of us married out of love and choice. But as time went by , our responsibilities increased and we lost that precious incredible feeling called togetherness! Only those who have lost it young or after decades of being together can tell us what it is not to have someone to hold you, when you are sad, or lonely, or scared, or simply for the sake of holding you close. It would be so terrible to know that you loved, and that your love had been taken away! It would be the end of life as we had known it to be! I learnt a lesson today and thank goodness not the hard way. Guys, we all need to slow down and enjoy our lives now. Carpe diem is the way to go. Why plan tomorrow so meticulously, when we don’t even know what is waiting for us the next moment? I know it seems all mushy and sugar-candy stuff, but I guess this is what is actually we live for!!!